Candy
In a society plagued by divorce, broken marriages, and shattered homes, it has become tough not to come upon a believer desirous to know if there is a way to get away from their hellish marriage without sinning against The Lord. So they ask, “What does the bible say about divorce?” hoping that they could find an answer pointing to God’s approval of their intention.
To answer this, let’s go to the word.
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. – Genesis 2:21-24
God created marriage and intended it to be good for us. Therefore, Elohim, the Godhead’s plurality, constituted the marriage institution’s framework. If we agree on this, it behooves everyone to ascertain God’s definition of divorce. Even as it is written, “For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away… – Malachi 2:16.”
The participants of marriage consenting to enter the corridors of such union have sentenced themselves to the rules of engagement.
Why is this standpoint important to the fabric of divorce hovering over the nations of the earth?
Solomon’s prayer to go God’s request was for ‘an understanding heart,’ such that he ruled with wisdom and knowledge,
Anything done without understanding its purpose is said to incur abuse in its administration.
The purpose of marriage is to cleave and become a unique expression of God’s union one to another. The expressed image of marriage is the Godhead. Therefore, anything that we can not find in the governance of the Godhead ought not to be found in the union between a man and his wife.
Together to cleave
Three words are closely associated with the union of a man and a woman: marriage, cleave, and divorce.
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” – Genesis 2:24
The word cleave is of interest to the marriage posture in correctly justifying divorce.
“Ye shall walk after the Lord our God, and fear him, and keep his commandments, and obey his voice, and ye shall serve him, and cleave unto him.” – Deuteronomy 13:4
The first understanding we must establish is, “Cleaving is a journey in the direction of your spouse!” The final destination toward our spouse is to ‘be one flesh.’
Before now, I have also thought cleaving to one’s spouse meant an instantaneous happenstance at the priest’s pronunciation of ‘man and wife.’ If I had gone into my marriage with this same idea that cleaving is supposed to happen at the moment, I would have had a very rough beginning in my marriage.
Understanding that cleaving to your spouse is a marathon race rather than a sprint makes us approach the stands of marriage differently.
In the journey of cleaving, the application and supply of submission and love ordinances become the vehicle that transports to the desired destination.
God’s Plan for Marriages
God’s desire for the family is so thoughtful and intentional that his majesty fights anything that would become its threat. So, to conceal his deep heart desire, God told Abraham, saying, “And I will bless them bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee; and in thee shall families of the earth be blessed.”
God commands” The Blessing” when a family is united. According to Psalm 133:1-3, David captured the beauty of unity, saying, “Behold, how good and how pleasant, it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head…even Aaron’s beard. .. As the dew of Hermon, and as the dew that descended upon the mountain of Zion: for there the Lord commanded the blessing, even life for evermore.”
The unity of a family is a terrestrial allocation that attracts the blessing of God.
The enemy called divorce.
“For as the girdle cleaveth to the loins of a man, so have I caused to cleave unto me the whole house of Israel and the whole house of Judah, saith the Lord; that they might be unto me a people, and for a name, and a praise, and for a glory: but they would not hear.” – Jeremiah 13:11
The family’s unity has had a ravaging enemy since the beginning of time called divorce.
The general understanding of divorce is that of two individuals separating from each other. But is that what God considers divorce?
With strong convictions, I believe that being divorced is more profound than just separation from one’s spouse or even the legal system of a nation granting such a request.
This I say with an underlining principle of the new command Jesus spoke about in Matthew 5:27-28. “Ye have heard that they said it of old time, thou shall not commit adultery: But I (Jesus) say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”
And Matthew 5:31-32, “It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement. But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery. And whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.”
A Higher Standard
The standards of marriage are higher under grace than when it was under the law of Moses. Much more, the means of marriage as Christians are weighty in the sight of God and his word.
According to “But I (Jesus) say,” it is a different command or administration of God’s ordinances regarding marriage. Divorce is not so much in the separation or filing for separation. It is the result of how the journey has been in cleaving one to another in becoming one flesh.
Let’s hear what Malachi 2:14-16 says:
“Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the Lord hath been a witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the Lord of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.”
Selah!
In these three verses, it is said to take heed to your spirit. That is very important if you ask me. The importance of the man with a heart of compassion towards the wife of his youth is as vital as the character of faithfulness with the wife towards her husband.
The Witness
God is the witness of the man and his wife. What that means is that God is the umpire. He judges how the man deals lovingly with his wife and how the wife deals faithfully with her husband.
Let us say it this way, if the man of his spirit deals treacherously with the wife of his youth, God, the eternal and supreme umpire of marriage, calls it DIVORCE! That means the man of his spirit has “put away” his wife, and such an act God hates.
“They say unto him (Jesus), Why did Moses then say to give a divorcement writing, and to put her away? He (Jesus) saith to them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning, it was not so.” – Matthew 19:7-8
Grounds for Divorce
Biblically there are only two grounds for divorce, which are; fornication and an unbelieving spouse that does not want to stay with a believing spouse. But, at the same time, death is grounds for annulment of the marriage covenant, which gives room for remarrying for the spouse still alive.
You may ask, what about grounds like domestic violence, irreconcilable differences, and so on?
Well, this is the blanket counsel for all of that, SEPARATION in the oversights of designated authorities one is accountable to, but not DIVORCE!
